I'm Confused

If you grow up in Hawaii, raised by your grandparents, you' re 'exotic, different.'

Grow up in Alaska eating mooseburgers, a quintessential American story.


If your name is Barack you're a radical, unpatriotic Muslim.

Name your kids Willow, Trig and Track, you're a maverick.


Graduate from Harvard law School and you are unstable.

Attend 5 different small colleges before graduating, you're well grounded.


If you spend 3 years as a brilliant community organizer, become the first black President of the Harvard Law Review, create a voter registration drive that registers 150,000 new voters, spend 12 years as a Constitutional Law professor, spend 8 years as a State Senator representing a district with over 750,000 people, become chairman of the state Senate's Health and Human Services committee, spend 4 years in the United States Senate representing a state of 13 million people while sponsoring 131 bills and serving on the Foreign Affairs, Environment and Public Works and Veteran's Affairs committees, you don't have any real leadership experience.

If your total resume is: local weather girl, 4 years on the city council and 6 years as the mayor of a town with less than 7,000 people, 20 months as the governor of a state with only 650,000 people, then you're qualified to become the country's second highest ranking executive.


If you have been married to the same woman for 19 years while raising 2 beautiful daughters, all within Protestant churches, you're not a real Christian.

If you cheated on your first wife with a rich heiress, and left your disfigured wife and married the heiress the next month, you're a Christian.


If you teach responsible, age appropriate sex education, including the proper use of birth control, you are eroding the fiber of society.

If, while governor, you staunchly advocate abstinence only, with no other option in sex education in your state's school system while your unwed teen daughter ends up pregnant, you're very responsible.


If your wife is a Harvard graduate lawyer who gave up a position in a prestigious law firm to work for the betterment of her inner city community, then gave that up to raise a family, your family's values don't represent America's.

If your husband is nicknamed 'First Dude,' with at least one DWI conviction and no college education, who didn't register to vote until age 25 and once was a member of a group that advocated the secession of Alaska from the USA, your family is extremely admirable.


OK, much clearer now.

(Not sure where this originated, or I'd give attribution. If you're the author, please let me know; I'd like to buy you a drink.)

How's Your Sex Life?

Now that I have your attention, I'd like to say a few words about the upcoming election. For years, no, decades, I have been trying to explain, in the simplest terms possible, to my "conservative" friends that voting for Republicans is acting contrary to their own self-interests. Despite having the facts on my side, and despite the fact that these fine folks are now experiencing for themselves the effects of thirty-plus years of trickle-down (piss on my leg and tell me it's raining) Reaganonmics, by way of the massive bloodletting of decent paying jobs to overseas companies, the shifting of the tax burden from wealthy individuals and huge corporations to the middle class, the gutting of programs designed to both act as a safety net and ensure at least a minimum standard of living, etc., for some odd reason, they still don't believe me. It's mind-boggling, really.

Once again, I see that the Republicans are trying to pull that same of scare tactic of branding Barack Obama a "tax and spend Liberal," in an attempt to get average, working people to vote for them because they're afraid that Obama's going to make their already dire financial situation (created by those wonderful Republican policies, BTW) worse. I call bullshit. Aside from the fact that even if he was a "tax and spend Liberal," I'd much prefer that to a "borrow and spend" corporatist, the facts just don't bear that out. Witness:



Unless I'm very sadly mistaken, or unless my friends are exceptionally adept at hiding their wealth from me and everyone else, I'm pretty sure that I don't even know anyone who makes more than $603,000 a year. Do you? Didn't think so.

Here, you can get a rough estimate of how much less you'll pay in taxes under Obama's plan, and how much more you'll pay under McCain's:

Tax Cut Calculator

Go ahead, take a moment and visit the link. I'll wait...

Okay, now that you've seen it for yourself, are you ready to set aside your delusions and vote your wallet? The rest of us would very much appreciate it.

By the way, my sex life? Fantastic. ;)

In Memoriam

Kurt Alexander Schaeffer II

January 20, 1975 - June 14, 2008

In the morning, everything is new.
The day's blank slate lies before me,
ready for my writing.
May it be words of beauty I write.
May it be deeds of grace I do.
May it be thoughts of joy I think.

Road Trip

We're planning a little excursion to Philly over Memorial Day weekend. This post is a gathering place for suggestions as to where to stay, what to see, etc. All contributions are greatly appreciated.

Fun for the whole family!

Take the Bush-McCain Challenge!

I know that this is difficult for some folks to grasp, but Republicans really aren't good for America, especially the current crop. And, Bush and McCain are two peas in a pod. So, if you really, really like George W. Bush and are happy with how his policies have affected you, your family and loved ones, and the country as a whole, well, then stick to your guns and vote for Huggy Bear in November. If, however, you're fed up with the corruption and cronyism that has enriched the very wealthiest and left the rest of us to fend for ourselves in corporate servitude, do yourself and future generations a big favor, and vote for whomever the Democrats nominate. It really is that simple.

The Wright Problem

See, now, I've got a whole 'nother take on the whole thing. To me, this is the most brilliant political move I've seen in decades, and, yes, I've been paying attention. First off, of course, Obama knew well before he threw his hat into the ring that the Reverend Wright was going to be an issue. Take that as a given. I know some people consider Obama naive, but he came up through Chicago politics. No one gets anywhere there unless they're pretty fucking savvy. So, the question is, what to do? Well, you come up with a plan. First, the most incendiary/controversial comments from the Reverend that you can come up with get blasted all over the Internet and cable TV. You make an inspiring (and, yes, it truly was) speech about race in America, and you denounce the comments while refusing to denounce the man. You use this as an opportunity to try to raise the level of debate, which, of course, fails to register anywhere in the media or punditry for more than thirty seconds of of 24-hour news day. But, it's out there. Some people are going to "get it" right off the bat, and consider the issue closed. Others, however, are going to have lingering questions about your association with this "nutjob." So, the next step is to create an opportunity to sever ties. The Reverend goes out one weekend and says more crazy shit. You show up the next day, remorseful and hurt to have to turn your back on the man who is a shadow of his former self... Now, there can be no question as to your relationship, as it is over. You have loudly and publicly divorced yourself of this whackjob. Everybody, the media, the pundits, Obama himself, looks at the Reverend as a sad case of what can happen when you let momentary fame and progressive insanity get a hold on you. It's fucking perfect. Come November, sure, McBush is gonna trot out the "God damn America" footage, but by then, the only people who are going to be swayed by it are those who wouldn't vote for a "fucking ni**er" anyway. Neutralized the threat. Anyone who doesn't think Obama's got his political chops has their head straight up their ass, IMHO.

Are you bitter yet?

Today's Wall Street Journal, admittedly no bastion of Liberal Thinking, informs me that, in the last eight years, the income of the top 1% of earners in this country has increased by 11%, while the income of the remaining 99% has increased by less that one percent. The article (which you should go read) also offers some helpful examples of how the incomes of many people have actually declined over this time period. Basically, what it comes down to is that the rich are getting richer, the poor are getting poorer, and the middle class is going the way of the dinosaurs. And yet, I hear many people out there are still of a mind to support Huggy Bear as a candidate in the upcoming Presidential election, despite the fact that he supports Bush's insane tax cuts for that 1% who are, quite literally, making out like bandits, not to mention the occupation of Iraq, which is now estimated to cost THREE TRILLION DOLLARS, much of which is being gobbled up by Bush/Cheney corporate cronies like Halliburton and Blackwater. Putting aside the moral outrage of the whole thing, and looking at it sheerly from the perspective of how this might affect you and your personal finances, I have but one question for you, if you are one of these people:

ARE YOU COMPLETELY FUCKING INSANE?

I mean, do you hate Black and Brown people, and/or women, enough to sacrifice not only your financial security but that of your children and grandchildren, and probably their children and grandchildren? Again, I'm not even going to get into the other issues, I'm talking strictly about your ability to pay your mortgage, put gas in the tank and food on the table. Are you that stuck in an ideology or tied to an issue that you will sell yourself into serfdom rather than admit that maybe, just maybe, Republicans have been playing you for a fool to line their own pockets? Do you honestly believe that tax cuts for the rich must be preserved for that glorious day when you will become one of them? I've got news for you, Dear Reader: If you're not rich now, it's highly unlikely that you ever will be. You will not become one of the Privileged Few. You will never have a seat at the table with people like the Bushes and the Cheneys. Not now, and certainly not ever, if you continue to vote against your own interests and give free reign to those who would happily enslave you.

Recently, Presidential candidate Barack Obama was criticized for the following remarks:

"It's not surprising, then, they get bitter, they cling to guns or religion or antipathy to people who aren't like them or anti-immigrant sentiment or anti-trade sentiment as a way to explain their frustrations."

Well, I would like someone to explain to me how, exactly, Senator Obama was wrong. For years, I've watched people who have lost their jobs, suffered due to lack of affordable health care, work longer and harder and for less money just to struggle to pay their bills, all due to Republican policies, continue to vote on contrived issues like gay marriage, immigration, and gun control. The Republicans have made gays and Brown People and Liberals into your "enemy" to distract you from the fact that THEY ARE THE ONES YOU SHOULD FEAR. Seriously, people, you need to wake the fuck up. Mexicans aren't taking your jobs, Republicans and their corporate whores are shipping them overseas. The Liberals aren't going to take your guns, and the homosexuals aren't going to force you to marry them; the Republicans just want you to think that so that you'll support policies that you know, deep down, are insane. Please, stop doing this.

Who's Responsible?

EXCUSE ME, but it seems that the tyrant in the White House could use some education regarding responsibility. First and foremost, the Bush administration's history of blatant disregard of constructive input and suppression of dissenting opinions are a testament to the unreasonable nature of this nation's current leaders. It's simply absurd to attempt to place responsibility for the fiasco in Iraq on people who tried their best to warn the warmongering Bush cronies of how their rush to invade Iraq under false pretenses would result in the current state of affairs by saying that "To oppose everything while proposing nothing is irresponsible."

A responsible leader would have considered the many suggestions that were made before embarking upon the ill-conceived course which was destined to yield such a quagmire. Many truly patriotic Americans and leaders of other nations offered pragmatic options which would have avoided the outcome that Bush was hell-bent to produce. However, this administration, which usurped power via dubious means, chose to pursue their short-sighted narrow minded agenda, while suppressing dissent at every turn.

All along, very responsible and informed people, Democrat and Republican alike, have offered plans and suggestions to try to mitigate the unconscionable situation in which we now find ourselves. To this very day, they continue to do so. The fact that the President sticks his fingers in his ears like a petulant five year-old and refuses to hear them does not negate the fact that they have, indeed, been brought to the table.

Now, the only reasonable option left to regain some credence as a benevolent, freedom-loving nation is to hold those who've perverted our government into one that rules by terror accountable to the people they have wronged, of America and around the world. Regime change with trials for subverting the Constitution at home and engaging in human rights violations abroad is the most promising proposal to mitigate the crimes of the miscreants who hijacked the government of the United States and restore some semblance of international respect for America and her people.

Friday Cat Blogging

Baby Kitty luurves her Daddy. And only her Daddy.


Vlad, The Old Man, prefers Mom.

Let's Pretend

Remember when you were a kid, and you used to play all those make-believe games? Cops and robbers, tea party, "doctor," knights and dragons, remember those? How cool was it to make up your own rules, be in charge, play your own game? I've got a new game for grownups called "Let's Pretend," and it starts like this:

Pretend you are not civilized. Pretend you love the land where you live. Pretend you were never taught to value economic production over life, or pretend you unlearned this. Pretend you were never taught that everyone else is here for you to use, or pretend you unlearned this. Pretend you do not feel entitled to take from those around you. Pretend you know that someday you will die.

-from Derrick Jensen's Endgame

Wouldn't it be wonderful to just throw away "conventional wisdom," to throw away all of the bullshit and stereotypes and rules of modern behavior, and, for once, as adults, realize that you actually are in charge, that you make your own rules, and that you don't have to conform to whatever it is that you think society expects of you? Wouldn't it be nice to start each day with joy instead of fear, knowing that no one else can decide for you except you? How refreshing would it be if everyone woke up one morning with the realization of both their significance and their insignificance in the scheme of things, and acted accordingly? What if we gave up selfishness and greed and prejudice and suddenly grasped the concept that we're all in this together, and that it truly is better to give than to receive? How much of your worldview is dependent on fear and hate, and how would you think differently unencumbered by those negative emotions? Yeah, I know, I'm a dirty fucking hippie and no one listens to me, but you know, I'd like to see what would happen if we all just tried, for one day, to play this little game of Let's Pretend.

Friday Cat Blogging

As soon as Mom gets up, they take over. At least the bed never gets cold.

Civics 101 (Subtitle: Government For Dummies)

Part one of an occasional series...

So, you say you're not a Constitutional scholar, but you don't need to be one. All you really need to understand is that our entire system of government was designed to be based on something called an "informed electorate." We, as Citizens, are supposed to inform ourselves regarding the issues that are of concern to us, and elect to represent us those who will do something about them. Right now, this country does not do that. At all. It irks me no end when people refer to our system of government as a "democracy." The US is NOT a democracy; it is a representative republic. Democracy, in its purest form, could best be described as "mob rule," where the majority opinion prevails, offering no protection of the minority or individual rights. For obvious reasons, the founders of this nation found that model undesirable. A representative republic, however, offers the opportunity for the majority opinion to hold some sway, while still protecting minority and individual rights within the structure of a Constitution. Much better, eh? However, the devil here is in the details. In order to "form a more perfect union," we must be accurately and sufficiently informed, so that we may elect those who will enact policy reflecting our educated opinions. When people are uneducated and ignorant both of the facts and the way that the government is supposed to work, we get what we have now, which is a government that is not representative of The People. It bothers me when people bitch about "The Government" as if it is some all-powerful entity outside of and superior to themselves; it is not. You are the government. I am the government. ("We The People," remember?) If our government fails, we ALL fail, as it is our job to put people in Washington (and in our States and municipalities) who are answerable to us. If we fail to hold them accountable, then what they do is just as much our fault. We don't elect Leaders here, we elect Representatives, and if those we elect are not representing us, then it is our job to throw the bums out and put in their places people who will.

People often ask me what the role of "government" should be. Well, as we are the "government," our first responsibility is to ourselves, to see that we are educated and informed. We, through the actions of our representative government, should see that people get the education and resources they need to be self-sufficient and to successfully self-govern. There has been, as I'm sure you're all aware, a concerted and systematic effort by certain forces in this country to dismantle public education, both in the schools and in general, in terms of the "news" that we all receive on a daily basis. Some refer to this as the "dumbing down" of America; Al Gore, who has written a book on the subject, refers to this as The Assault on Reason.

In order to correct this situation, We the People need to spend some serious time educating ourselves, and insisting on much higher standards than are currently in place, both in terms of education and in the conduct of our elected representatives. Look at what passes for "news" on television, for example. Do you really care that much about the fate of Anna Nicole Smith? Is her baby's paternity a vital issue of national concern? Will people live or die as the result of Brittney Spears' shaved head? More people vote for American Idol (or, as I refer to it, American Idle) than in a national election, for crying out loud. Does this seem right to you? If you can keep track of a dozen contestants over a period of ten weeks, is it that much of a leap to ask you to keep your eye on one Congressperson, two Senators, and a few pieces of potentially life-altering legislation? And, while we fill our heads with mindless drivel like this, the very pillars of our society such as the rule of law and the right to habeas corpus are being struck deadly blows by those who seek only their own empowerment and enrichment. I struggled to find the appropriate quote with which to leave you as food for thought, as there are so many. I finally decided on this:

"If a nation expects to be ignorant and free in a state of civilization, it expects what never was and never will be." --Thomas Jefferson to Charles Yancey, 1816

Forbidden Luvz

Just. Stop. Now.

Sometimes I See Things

Preznit iz fuckwit.
That iz all.

(Original photo: AFP/Saul Loeb)

Is this thing on?

Well, I've finally decided to start a blog. I've avoided it for this long, as I really haven't had the time or the inclination to maintain it in a manner that would meet my standards for a "real" blog. But, in the end, I figured it was more important to me to have a place of my own to post my ramblings than to try to adhere to some standard. So, herein I will post about things that piss me off, things that make me smile, and perhaps, occasionally, offer a little insight. Assuming that at some point in time, someone other than me will actually read this space, welcome, and feel free to join the conversation.